Jewish Weddings in Italy

By Slow Dreams - Weddings in Italy

Jewish Wedding Costs

IMPORTANT:

• Jewish weddings require civil marriage approval

• No Residency Requirements - Unlike most of Italy, indeed Europe,  there are no residency nor minimum stay requirements for the region of the Coast of Maratea and the Cilento.

• Outdoor Weddings Are Legal - Also, unlike most of Italy and Europe, outdoor weddings are legal  -  except for Catholic weddings which must be held in a church.

• Jewish Wedding can be outdoors or in one of two catholic churches  -  click here for photos

THE CEREMONY

Our rabbi is female and is a Progressive/Reform rabbi and, as such, conducts a modern Jewish or Jewish Interfaith wedding.  The wedding ceremony features a combination of Hebrew and English (along with  Italian or Spanish if needed).   

The rabbi will work with the couple to plan the ceremony, but there are elements which are essential to the Jewish ceremony and these must be included. The wedding will be spiritual in nature, God is mentioned and there are prayers and blessings.  The rabbi does not conduct a secular ceremony.  If the wedding is a Jewish/Interfaith ceremony, the focus is on those things that unite us.  For example, the rabbi focuses on the one God above (Jesus is not mentioned).

The rabbi personalizes the ceremony by incorporating family ritual items such as a family kiddush cup, tallit or Bible. Ritual items from both faiths are included if the couple desires it.

The chuppah or wedding canopy, is essential. Often local florists can create a 'stand-alone" chuppah and the rabbi will help the florist with the chuppah if he/she is unfamiliar.  If the rabbi brings her own chuppah and poles  the rental fee is 100 Euros. 

The rabbi personalizes her words to the couple.

If the couple desires, the Rabbi will incorporate the signing of the ketubah, or traditional Jewish wedding document in the wedding service.  The couple must supply their own ketubah, however the rabbi will assist them in finding an appropriate one.  There are beautiful interfaith ketubot with wording that celebrates the interfaith family. 

The rabbi requires one meeting, either in person or by telephone.  If it is a telephone call, the rabbi and the couple make a phone appointment.  The rabbi phones the couple and the three of them speak together for about one hour.

The rabbi will speak to the respective families if need be.  Sometimes, with Interfaith families, it is important that both families feel comfortable with the ceremony and that the non Jewish family feel included (it is important that they do not feel like outsiders at their own son or daughter's wedding).  Conversely, there can be different expectations among family members even when both families are Jewish.  The rabbi is happy to speak to any and all family members if the couple wishes.

The rabbi will co-officiate with priest or a minister, but the rabbi provides the outline and the final determination of the content of the ceremony.  The rabbi will speak with and plan the ceremony with the priest/minister and for this reason the fee is higher.

If the ceremony is held in Europe, the couple must have a civil ceremony  first.  Slow Dreams will organize a very informal legal ceremony  just with the mayor and the couple.   

ADDITIONAL SERVICES FOR THE WEDDING COUPLE

The rabbi is fluent in Italian.  Should the couple need help with arrangements, the rabbi is ready to assist.  (For example, the rabbi is often asked to help the florist with construction of a free standing chuppah.)

If desired, the rabbi will lead and/or organize the kiddush blessing and the HaMotzi (blessing over the challah bread) at the reception. 

Should the couple desire Jewish music during the ceremony and/or reception, the rabbi will work with musicians to help with musical selections and she will mail/FAX sheet music to the musicians as well. 

The rabbi will work by phone with the wedding coordinator and, if necessary, help her/him plan the wedding rehearsal.  If the wedding rehearsal is held on a separate day, the rabbi is not present for the formal rehearsal.

The rabbi supplies an outline of the wedding but not the wording of the complete ceremony. 

SPECIAL CONSIDERATIONS

In the Jewish religion, weddings are not conducted on the Jewish Sabbath, Shabbat.  For this reason The rabbi will not conduct a wedding on Friday evening or Saturday during the day.  Weddings may be held on Saturday evening, Sunday and throughout the week.  If a wedding is scheduled for Friday, the ceremony should conclude prior to sundown.

If the rabbi has a dire emergency and cannot officiate, the rabbi will find a substitute.  The fee and expenses are then negotiated between the substitute and the couple. The rabbi will return the deposit to the couple.